Final Embrace supports discussions on death

In supporting aged care facilities and retirement homes to break the ice on death, the funeral service encourages a sense of acceptance on the topic and eases the essential conversation.

Final Embrace principal funeral director Dean Saitta said while death was difficult to discuss, it was important to bridge the gap between funeral planning and aged care.

“I think it’s a really hard thing, in general, for people to face. No-one wants to do it, but it is a reality,” Mr Saitta said.

“For nursing homes and aged care facilities, when someone comes into their care, that’s most likely going to be their last time, so it’s really important that their time is spent really well, which is often the case because our nursing homes and aged care facilities are wonderful.

“I suppose those conversations, although difficult to have, they’re really important.”

To aid aged care facilities in touching on the topic with those in their care, Final Embrace Funerals offers a number of resources.

Mr Saitta said this was not only beneficial for those in care, but it also aided care staff.

“We do supply a lot of our nursing homes and facilities with resources and information that they can use to navigate the individual and their family through those difficult conversations,” he said.

“Things like a fact sheet that has some questions that the family would most likely ask, and other resources to give the nurses ways to deal with families that are going through that end-of-life planning stage as well.

“It’s not only dealing with the families and letting them know what’s going to happen and what the process is, but it also makes a difference for the nurses because a lot of residents become like family to them.

“They become really involved with those people, it’s not just a job for them. It’s about providing everyone with resources and support networks that they’ll need during this time.”

Although it’s common that individuals don’t want to be involved in conversations about their own death and funeral, including them in the conversation, often before they even enter a retirement home or aged care facility, has a significant impact on the process of planning.

While the funeral service is often most impactful on the loved ones left behind, allowing them to grieve and process losing their family member or friend, Mr Saitta said ensuring the needs and wants of everyone was met played a significant role in funeral planning.

“It’s really important to have those discussions prior to going into aged care or nursing home facilities, and even through retirement, while you’re still able to make those decisions for yourself,” Mr Saitta said.

“Quite often people will start having the conversation and they don’t realise what sort of things come up, and things they may have just thought that their loved one would want, or just presumed, is quite the opposite to what they thought.

“I definitely think that funerals are for the living, they’re not for the dead. It’s our way of saying goodbye and dealing with the grief.

“But, in the same token, a lot of people really want to make sure that they’re represented in the way they want to be represented at their funeral.”

Mr Saitta said having the individual involved in the discussion also allowed an ease of mind for their loved ones, who could be assured they were doing the right thing when planning their funeral.

Offering some advice on beginning the difficult discussion, Mr Saitta said it was usually best to approach it casually.

“It all depends on the different circumstances, but I do think that when people have those conversations, they generally start off in a much more lighthearted, sort of joking, way,” he said.

“It’s always a good way to sort of break the ice to deal with those sorts of conversations, making it into a sort of joke or a funny thing first, and then you do get some more serious stuff out of that.”

For more information on what Final Embrace Funerals can offer, phone 5756 3740 or visit finalembracefunerals.com.au